Odd happenings
You may ask yourself (said in my best David Byrne voice), what do roosters and bathrooms have to do with each other? Nothing obvious, except that they've both been the catalyst for very weird happenings in my life lately.
First the rooster: I live, with my wife and son, in a fairly secluded and rural area surrounding a small but lively city in Northwest England. This has been a blessing in many ways; it's quiet, we've been able to get to know a couple neighbors really well, it's close enough to the town that we can get a bottle of wine on a Friday evening pretty easily if we feel like we need one. We live in a semi-detached house (that's Brit-speak for a duplex - a single building holding two houses), that sits on a fairly well traveled country lane. Behind us we have a field used for growing hay and cows - depending on the time of year. Across the street there is another house owned by two elderly people. All told, there are about three families living within 1/2 a kilometer from us - thus the area tends to be pretty quiet. That all changed the other night...somehow, and we're still not sure how, a rooster came to call our front yard home. There are several working farms near our house, but none are close enough that a rooster could escape and remain at large without being apprehended. Normally, I would be all for having a rooster in my yard...after all, it's a pretty interested experience. It also allows my son to get up close to a living animal other than a dog or cat. The problem with roosters - and this cannot be overstated - is that they are roosters...they crow all day long, starting at the crack of dawn. And those of you who know anything about England will be aware that the crack of dawn comes a lot earlier around here than it does in most other places...on the longest days of the year, the sun will rise at 4:45, but it will have gotten bright outside much earlier than that. Thankfully, that's not the case anymore, but it still gets light just after 5:00 am...and that's when the rooster starts crowing. The other day, at 5:10 am, I, armed with two golf clubs, was chasing that rooster down our street in my pajamas - the intention was not to harm it, of course, but I'm sure I looked quite mad...if only my wife had followed me down and videotaped it...
Now for the bathroom: I've written here previously that the closest bathroom (restroom, WC, loo, whatever you want to call it) to my office is unisex...meaning that both females and males may use it. This building, in the past, must have been an all female dorm of some sort because there is not a urinal to be found anywhere - this, and the subsequent fact that everything must be done in stalls has been my saving grace. In the past, I have had several awkward instances of entering or exiting the restroom while a female colleague passes me in the opposite direction. I'm not sure why this is awkward other than it is different from any other bathroom experience that I've ever had...anyway, I've gotten used to the fact that women and men can be using the restroom at the same time, and I'll usually stay in my stall longer than necessary to avoid any weirdness that I might feel in actually seeing these people. The other day, this all changed. I was leaving my office to use the restroom, when a female colleague asked me to come in to talk about some work related issues. I ducked into her office to see if it might be something short, however, when it became clear that the discussion would not be over in an expedient manner, I asked if I might excuse myself and come back after I was done. To my horror, she said, "oh, I've got to use the restroom as well. I'll walk down with you." This was weird enough, in that it forced us to walk down the hallway fully aware of what was happening, but the true atrocity was waiting once we were in the stalls and doing our business...at this point, she decided to continue the conversation that we were having in her office. Now, I have had similar experiences with male friends as we stood at urinals in a men's room at a sports bar, however, I never - and I mean NEVER - in a thousand years would have been expecting to have a business conversation with a female employee while we both peed...
Anyway...I'm not sure that I've come any closer to finding the link between restrooms and roosters, but just thought it would be interesting to eternalize my weird experiences on this blog...
You may ask yourself (said in my best David Byrne voice), what do roosters and bathrooms have to do with each other? Nothing obvious, except that they've both been the catalyst for very weird happenings in my life lately.
First the rooster: I live, with my wife and son, in a fairly secluded and rural area surrounding a small but lively city in Northwest England. This has been a blessing in many ways; it's quiet, we've been able to get to know a couple neighbors really well, it's close enough to the town that we can get a bottle of wine on a Friday evening pretty easily if we feel like we need one. We live in a semi-detached house (that's Brit-speak for a duplex - a single building holding two houses), that sits on a fairly well traveled country lane. Behind us we have a field used for growing hay and cows - depending on the time of year. Across the street there is another house owned by two elderly people. All told, there are about three families living within 1/2 a kilometer from us - thus the area tends to be pretty quiet. That all changed the other night...somehow, and we're still not sure how, a rooster came to call our front yard home. There are several working farms near our house, but none are close enough that a rooster could escape and remain at large without being apprehended. Normally, I would be all for having a rooster in my yard...after all, it's a pretty interested experience. It also allows my son to get up close to a living animal other than a dog or cat. The problem with roosters - and this cannot be overstated - is that they are roosters...they crow all day long, starting at the crack of dawn. And those of you who know anything about England will be aware that the crack of dawn comes a lot earlier around here than it does in most other places...on the longest days of the year, the sun will rise at 4:45, but it will have gotten bright outside much earlier than that. Thankfully, that's not the case anymore, but it still gets light just after 5:00 am...and that's when the rooster starts crowing. The other day, at 5:10 am, I, armed with two golf clubs, was chasing that rooster down our street in my pajamas - the intention was not to harm it, of course, but I'm sure I looked quite mad...if only my wife had followed me down and videotaped it...
Now for the bathroom: I've written here previously that the closest bathroom (restroom, WC, loo, whatever you want to call it) to my office is unisex...meaning that both females and males may use it. This building, in the past, must have been an all female dorm of some sort because there is not a urinal to be found anywhere - this, and the subsequent fact that everything must be done in stalls has been my saving grace. In the past, I have had several awkward instances of entering or exiting the restroom while a female colleague passes me in the opposite direction. I'm not sure why this is awkward other than it is different from any other bathroom experience that I've ever had...anyway, I've gotten used to the fact that women and men can be using the restroom at the same time, and I'll usually stay in my stall longer than necessary to avoid any weirdness that I might feel in actually seeing these people. The other day, this all changed. I was leaving my office to use the restroom, when a female colleague asked me to come in to talk about some work related issues. I ducked into her office to see if it might be something short, however, when it became clear that the discussion would not be over in an expedient manner, I asked if I might excuse myself and come back after I was done. To my horror, she said, "oh, I've got to use the restroom as well. I'll walk down with you." This was weird enough, in that it forced us to walk down the hallway fully aware of what was happening, but the true atrocity was waiting once we were in the stalls and doing our business...at this point, she decided to continue the conversation that we were having in her office. Now, I have had similar experiences with male friends as we stood at urinals in a men's room at a sports bar, however, I never - and I mean NEVER - in a thousand years would have been expecting to have a business conversation with a female employee while we both peed...
Anyway...I'm not sure that I've come any closer to finding the link between restrooms and roosters, but just thought it would be interesting to eternalize my weird experiences on this blog...